Sheep Celebrate Christmas Eve as Trump Announces New White House Toy Workshop, Immediately Demands Credit From Santa

The pasture awoke to jingling alarms this Christmas Eve after Donald Trump announced plans to build a new toy-making workshop at the White House, explaining that Santa’s operation is “very outdated” and “not nearly efficient enough.”

According to Trump, the workshop will produce toys faster, bigger, and more patriotically, with elves reclassified as “sea…